I distinctly remember the first time I saw Facebook. There had been whispers about an intern working in my department. He was constantly checking this blue and white forum — my colleagues ruled it out as some uni fad. But then, like millions of others, I was drawn in. That was 2006 in the UK so I was a relatively early adopter. In fact, that experience possibly altered my career path forever. I now manage countless social accounts for businesses for a living and Facebook still brings in the greatest traffic and revenue. But I no longer use it myself if I can avoid it.
Social media brings with it a side effect that few people are prepared for. I truly believe that now social networking is commonplace I have become unhappier. It’s definitely not just me either — this story about the Thai Health Ministry’s concerns for its citizens shows that there is a real psychological issue at hand. The Selfie (an odious word) is the height of modern narcissism — it it now standard that in order to enjoy an activity we must show to others that we are participating in it. Sometimes we forget to look at the beautiful sunset for fear of missing a photographic opportunity. Going a step further, I have heard tale of 14 year old’s who dress up at home, take photos of themselves pretending that they are going to parties, upload these on to Facebook, secure some envious likes and then change back into their pyjamas. Thus, social media is now changing how we live our lives, not just facilitating how we live them.
If this reliance on image is the future of interaction it adds a layer of responsibility to my job — going beyond usual customer service and ensuring that I post updates that will enhance — not obliterate — the self confidence of the audience — a delicate balance to get right. With that in mind I am slowly removing myself from personal interaction with platforms. By distancing myself from what I post — using a company tone of voice and becoming aspirational without overloading on materialism, and, crucially, not revealing my personal thoughts — I hope to quash this strong feeling of negativity. I’m sad to say that the ‘hide’ button on Facebook is my current favourite tool. For I do not want to know every detail of my friends’ lives from potty training their toddler to the view from their holiday hotel suite. I miss the days when we had experts on topics and I didn't have to close my ears and eyes to the noise from every single person I know. Already this tactic is helping me. It is a combination of the competitive aspect of social media and the frequency of updates that creates the tension. When I see someone share news of their engagement, house purchase or new kitten I am genuinely happy for them. I click like, along with 40 others. But these events occur infrequently in people’s lives. I will not praise the bunch of flowers you received ‘just because’. Although I shudder at the thought that my Instagram account may tell a different story.
There is an upward trend towards new Facebook signups in the over 55's. Weirdly, I don't think that this is a good thing — not that I have any power to stop it. I think we need a generation that carries out its socialising in a traditional manner, as there will soon come a time when using land-line telephones and sending letters will seem quaint and antiquated (has this time already arrived?).
A final thought is that I am not the only one desperate to switch off. My boyfriend has a Facebook profile that he never uses — most of my vague acquaintances don’t even know that we’re in a relationship even though it is clearly labelled on both of our profiles. We are slaves to the Facebook/Twitter/Daily Mail feeds these days. My boyfriend is one of the happiest people I know. Upon occasion he may not find out about an event until much later than his more Facebook-savvy friends, but he also doesn't compare himself to others. He doesn't care how nice a distant relative’s new car is, nor does he know this season’s fashion trends. He has previously asked me what ‘twerking’ and ‘Snapchat’ are as if they are words from a foreign language — which perhaps they are. He gets his news from newspapers and reliable websites. He has a quick gander on his favourite twitter profiles without ever needing to sign up and comment himself, and if he wants a giggle he reads cracked.com. He uses the tools the internet provides to serve his purposes, not the other way round. I wonder which one of us is the better social media manager?
